Psychotic Rage

Everybody knows somebody who can't seem to control their anger. C'mon, it's true, we are an angry people. I am. Well, rarely. But still. Very. Very. Angry. There are people who are pissed off 80% of the time, 20% of the time.... Everybody gets mad at some point. But everybody gets angry differently, I've noticed. Some people mutter profanities under their breath and let their anger simmer beneath their skin. Other people physically lash out on impulse, likely punching whoever gets in their way. Yet others lash out emotionally, which can be impulsive or planned... hurtful words, or some vengeful scheme to get back at someone. Some people take anger towards others and amplify it internally, basically coming to hate themselves. And then there are people like me, people who don't seem to feel anger at all... but one wrong word and they snap, all of that composure and self-control, lost within seconds. Surprise, surprise! 

But it happens, right? Why even bring it up? Well, today it so happened that I got very angry, and I noticed some things I didn't quite understand. For one, when I get angry I don't get mad, I get destructive-psychotic-manic-rage angry...rip-shelves-from-walls angry...punch-fists-through-the-walls-and-windows angry. You get the point. But anyway....

I noticed that every time I get incredibly angry I get very nauseous, so much that I have to hold back from just throwing up all over the place. Ew. What the hell? My vision blurs and it takes forever to go back to normal (it still hasn't and it's been like 5 hours), not that I see all that well to begin with. I wear corrective lenses for a reason. So I did research, mainly consisting of typing it into Google and clicking on the first few links of the results. 

Anger, directly associated with stress and arousal, triggers the "fight or flight" response. The eyes become dilated (causing blurry vision) or constricted. The digestive process stops, so you either throw up or get a burning sensation in your stomach (due to elevated levels of stomach acid trying to speed things along). You're beginning to be prepared to fight for your life if need be, something better done on an empty stomach. Pain signals to your brain get cut off, the probable reason people in fights take so many blows without seeming to feel anything. Adrenaline starts pumping, your heart starts racing, and your blood pressure goes up... likely the cause of the "pounding in your ears" when you're angry or upset. 

Unfortunately, the angrier you get, the worse the crash will be. You end up with a killer headache and no good decisions. So much for effective fighting skills. Well, that is all for now. I have a headache, but I am finally exhausted enough to sleep for a bit, a truly rare joy. 

Goodnight <3

Peace out